Tuesday, 24 August 2021

Irony

Post-election times are always confusing.     But this post-GE 14 era has been especially chaotic.  It's had more than its fair share of drama, deceit, intrigue, opportunism, spite, self-delusion, conspiracy, malfeasance, and egregious egotism.  Enough nouns, I think, to explain why this country had to have three Prime Ministers in the span of three years!

When we write the history of Malaysia during this period, the main  reference point will not be the short premiership of PM so-and-so - compared to other so-and-sos who achieved 5 years, 10 years or 22 years.   It will be why were there three PMs in three years?

Just how did we get this many and this far?

The transition from 7th to 8th PM was initiated by the resignation of the 7th PM.     But the shift from 8th to 9th is a different cup of tea entirely.   It's a real Shakespearean tragi-comedy.     Just consider the facts.    The 8th PM's term of office was utterly unique.    And it was utterly unique for two reasons above all.    Firstly, its entire span coincided with the worst pandemic, the worst health emergency, that this country has ever seen (indeed, it's been one of the worst in global history).   Secondly, while the administration (including the Civil Service) were working flat out to uphold the balance between Life and Livelihood ( perhaps the 7th PM  could have  done better?) - the entire Parliamentary Opposition and their enthralled promoters were looking in the opposite direction.      They were set almost completely on shuffling the chairs - on "regime change".    Why?   Because No 8 had upset their apple cart by moving into the slot left wide open by the departure of No. 7.  

So the campaign for the "Return of the Rakyat's Mandate" was set in  motion.   What followed was a time-wasting parade of tantalising manoeuvres and slick silly slogans like "we have the numbers", and self-righteous grumbles that the Emergency was only there to keep a desperate teetering backdoor government in power (with the connivance, of course, of YDP Agong - according to the closet and card-carrying Malaysian Republicans).  Then came the "Failed Government" or Kerajaan Gagal  offensive, inspired by the stigma of  "Failed State"thrown at Malaysia by Bloomberg's favourite Ozzie Daniel Moss, and  (not to be outdone) Al Jazeera's characterisation of Malaysia's Covid 19 performance as a "Mini India". 

In the midst of all this came the Indian (or "Delta") Variant.     Don't talk about India - even the most "democratic" and most "highly developed" western nations could not keep the Indian Delta Variant at bay. 

The long-suffering Rakyat watched this Punch and Judy Show going on and wondered "is this democracy"?  The numbers afflicted and dying and dead  because of Covd 19 kept on rising.  So while the Rakyat 'burned', the Neros in our political circus 'fiddled' with  personal ambition and dubious numbers.   Once again, the nation was on the brink of  disaster due to the working wonders of democracy.  

But then suddenly there was light.    The 8th PM, acting according to the Constitution, submitted his resignation.   So did the entire Cabinet.    At last - and for the only time in this mess of silly shenanigans - I could feel proud of my country, proud that we had the political confidence and principles to act like a proper Parliamentary democracy.     And remember, children, when you read your history books: this is the nation condemned by liberals (local, imported and international) as being  dominated by extremist, racist Muslim Malays.  What say Daniel Moss/Bloomberg and Al Jazeera?

Teras terunjam, gubal melayang - the core of the tree is fixed deep in the ground, but the sapwood is blown away. 

On Friday last week the Rakyat waited with bated breath for the new  9th PM of Malaysia.  What was new??

Kera lotong terlalu makan, tupai di julai timpa perasan. When the monkeys eat too much, the squirrels on the lower branches have to suffer for it - Covid 19 or no Covid 19.

                                                            ========================

But oh! The irony, the irony of it all!      For the moment, the circus is over.    And what did it achieve?

1. It resulted in the return of UMNO which the unholy allianceof Mahathir, Anwar/Keadilan and DAP  fought tooth and nail to overthrow in May 2018.  Indeed they succeeded.  They had a "good run" and they savoured the  sweetness of power. But then they botched it in February 2020.  

Members of Pakatan Harapan Cabinet , 2018 - 2020


They tried it again in August 2021.  When the 8th PM offered an olive branch of  a unity government and reforms (the ones they'd demanded) it was rejected outright because they could smell the  blood of victory wafting into their camp.  This was to be Anwar's/ Keadilan's and DAP's coup de grace.

But beware of what you wish for!!!!!

2.  The Republicans now look to the Monarchy in the hope that the latter can be used to fit their agenda.   The liberals in Keadilan, DAP, Amanah and Pejuang - and other Pakatan Harapan's comrades in East Malaysia, as well as those outside the fold of the political parties - were not sweet on the Monarchy.  They would like to have it shackled or abolished altogether.

So I was quite bemused when I read this. 





"When you break the rules this time ....... others can break the rules too ... ".

Politicians in Malaysia  are veterans of the art of "sauce for the goose is not for the gander" - of hypocrisy and self-righteousness.

Do as I say, don't do as I do.

                                                   ========================


More so when I looked at the comment by Kadir Jasin.   Oh, how they give themselves away, that bevy of self-regarding acolytes that cling to the coat-tails of each and every political leader/party.  

Betrayal, like Beauty, is in the eye of the beholder.

Remember this?

Betrayal is a two-edged sword.   You betray others as well as yourself.

Furthermore, do we, can we  - looking at the gross inequality, injustice and inconsistencies around us, here in Malaysia or everywhere else - believe that people reap what they sow?

As well as the "hungry wolves" , we have to be aware of the "wolf in sheep's clothing", the opportunists and the hypocrites.  Better the devil you know than the devil you don't.

As for the reapers and sowers I believe Pakatan Harapan and their allies take the cake when the post of Premiership and a glorious comeback evaded them once again.   Failed Opposition!  Pembangkang Gagal!

                                                     ============================

 

Iznogoud (created by Goscinny and Tabary) is one of my very favourite comic-book characters.  He has an indefatigable spirit in pursuing his lifelong ambition to be "Caliph instead of the Caliph".


Malaysia has more than its share of "Iznogouds".        Think of the shenanigans over the past few years.  Now think of the latest grumbling from the East Malaysian state of Sabah.




Which reminds me of the occasion of the launching of The Vibes on 20 September 2020 at Kota Kinabalu when their Sponsor expressed that lofty sentiment that "Malaya [ so glad to be called by our own name instead of that nondescript West Malaysia, Peninsular Malaysia ] has an infection and Sabah and Sarawak has the antibiotic we desperately need. .....  The thing about Sabah is that it's not judgemental."   

Oh, the irony, the irony!

By the way the global Medical Establishment have been warning us about antibiotic resistance - it fails to work if we overuse it.

Oh the irony, the irony!










Thursday, 19 August 2021

A Little Lockdown Levity

 The old and short-lived government resigned en masse.

Long Live the New Government !!

Here is an illustration of the battle for democracy and MPs  (to hell with the Rakyat and Covid-19) - a sort of 21st Century Malaysian Parliamentary Olympics.

ENJOY!   Let's cheer them on.




And how will this Government be chosen?

By Statutory Declarations.

Aaah I have another Guide for Seduced Statutory Declarants  - thanks to Monty Python again.

Let's cheer them on too. But - du ..u .. u ..hhhh??


Thank Goodness for Monty Python.

I shall just be a sweet lil ole lady today and every day and ..... and 🙈🙉🙊

Sungguh gemilang negri ku

Yang ku chinta oh Tanah M ............




Monday, 16 August 2021

Malaysia (Malaya) - Tanah tumpah darah ku.

64 years ago on August 31 1957, in our kampung house at Pasir Panjang Road Singapore, we were listening to the radio.  When the Union Jack was lowered and the flag of Persekutuan Tanah Melayu was raised, I saw the pride and glow on my Abah's face which said, "At last my country is free".  But then the tears began to flow - they were not tears of joy because he said very sombrely, "What will happen to my people?"

Abah, today at 3 pm. 16 August 2021, your daughter cried as she listened to Prime Minister Muhyiddin tendering his resignation.

They were not tears at the demise  of a mainly Malay-led Government that had to attend to a pandemic (a trauma that this country has never seen before) but they were bringing us close to the light at the end of a dark, dark tunnel.  

My tears are like yours in 1957.  What will happen to my people, and not just Malays?

We spiked the Malayan Union, we recovered from the Japanese Occupation, we beat the Malayan Communist Party insurrection, we learned and re-booted ourself after May 13.  But we were beaten by greed, envy, lust for power, pride and bodoh-sombong of our fellow Malays.  For me the one courageous voice of sanity came from Tony Pua.  I may not agree with his politics but he has the spirit and the honesty to be able to reconcile his political affiliations, which are in opposition to the Government, with the needs and priorities of his country.

As for the other voices of Malay leadership, their silence is loud and clear. They wait and see which way the wind blows.  They smell blood and they want to swoop in on the kill - and tear it and everything else to shreds.     To hell with the Rakyat and the Tanah Pusaka, they say.      To hell with what we've achieved in the past.    To hell with what we could achieve in the future.

Here's a simple story with a moral message from my old Malay school textbook.


"Engkau ini sama jahat," kata emak-nya.

But the Malays I fear do not have an emak and abah to guide and discipline them.  

We are now Anak Yatim despite our modern and religious education, despite our economic progress - or, perhaps, exactly because of our economic progress, because we fell prey to the wolf of greed, because we lost sight of morality.

"Lekas makan, tanggalkan baju itu. "  I doubt that our Malay leaders and leadership will dare to do that. Their hands are so filthy, like Lady Macbeth's hands ; and nothing will ever wipe it clean.

Abah, this is what we Malays look like today. 

 






All the King's horses and all the King's men will not put the Humpty Dumpty Malays together again ..........  perhaps only after the worms have had enough of them.

Our tears are futile.


Saturday, 14 August 2021

Incensed

 Found this new (for me) word  when I was reading the news from UK this morning.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/home/index.html

The headlines read:

Headline from the Daily Mail.


https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2021/aug/13/plymouth-shootings-may-be-a-sign-the-incel-culture-is-spreading


INCEL.  That's the new word.  This septuagenarian has been bombarded by so many new fangled  words, acronyms and terminologies from techno-language, from msg (not mono-sodium glutamate) lingo and even smiley speech, so this one is just another stopover on my learning curve.

So off I went to the Internet because it would be futile to search in my reliable 1960 OED dictionary unless I have the January 2021 edition!

INCEL.  It means ....


From Merriam-Webster


From the Cambridge Dictionary

Well, it has to do with that crotchety obsession of the the 21st century - Sex!!  And it has its very own cultural connotations like the word woke.

Now, what would my lovely Macik Ayik ask me if she was still here today. 

Sex tu apa 'nak?

[ In the late 1950s my Emak would despatch me to Macik Ayik and Pacik Mat's house in Kampung Bukit Panjang for the December school holidays.  They had no children and I loved being with them because Macik Ayik especially, pampered me no end.  On December 25 1956, I was sitting on the amben and chatting with Macik Ayik and I said to her .

"Macik, hari 'ni Hari Christmas"

She gave me an indulgent smile and asked. "Christmas tu apa 'nak?" ]

'Nuff said.

Looking at the political culture that has been breeding in my Tanah Air, (especially during the pandemic) and the the bog-standard quality of our political leaders and leadership ......






....... and the cretinous reputation of our MPs in our revered Parliament recently ......




...... this news today is to be expected.

Today's headlines.

I reckon there are some or maybe all parts of our politicians that cannot be reached - it's like sloshing in a bottomless pit of  the seven deadly sins:  of pride, greed, lust, envy, gluttony, wrath and sloth!

Maybe it is time for this septuagenarian to contribute another word close enough to INCEL relevant to our particular political culture.

I do fancy this word - INPOLIMP - which refers to those who are are stricken with the  Involuntary Politically Impotent virus - a neurotic obsession about political impotence.

I shall borrow the Merriam-Webster template to define INPOLIMP which includes :

(a) ...... extreme resentment and hostility towards those who are sexually (politically) active.

(b) ....lack of sexual (political) power - many of them placing the blame on women ( the incumbent government).

(c) ...... who express rage at women (the ruling and other political parties) for denying them sex (perks to plunder plus the Premiership) and who frequently fantasize about violence (statutory declarations) and celebrate mass shooters ( votes of no confidence and party-hopping).


INPOLIMP  brings with it a waft of self-righteousness  and victimhood disguised as a fragrant incense supposedly to  give  power  and consent back to the Rakyat.

But why is AsH so incensed?  Aren't you??










 




Sunday, 8 August 2021

Malaysia's Parliament - Our very own Bunkum and Blarney (apologies to Barnum and Bailey) Circus ......

 ...... but to compare the antics of the MPs to the  professional, competent, intelligent and skilful acrobats,  jugglers, fire-eaters, weightlifters and clowns is an insult to them and the Circus industry.  This I write on the premise that animals are banned from performing at all Circuses ....

...... which reminds me of one my favourite songs from the 70s.  It was my late brother Akim who blasted this song every Sunday morning on his super-duper hifi set and his staid school-mistress Kakak just fell for it.

Years and years after his passing I looked for the song on YouTube. The video was just stunning.  So I shall use this video to illustrate my frustrations, anger and my sense of  hopelessness and helplessness at the state of my Tanah Air.

Keep a lookout for the greedy toff, the clown struggling with the plastic chicken (he is actually a professional clown) and the raunchy-looking lass.


"Stuck in the middle with you" by the group Stealers Wheel was written by Gerry Rafferty, my favourite 1970s singer-songwriter and Scotsman. Ssshh, don't mention this to my official Scotsman-spouse.


                                           ======================================


STUCK IN THE MIDDLE WITH YOU - Stealers Wheel

Here are the lyrics (in blue), with a sprinkling of  various pertinent images. 



Well I don't know why I came here tonight.

Showdown at the OK Corral


I've got the feeling that something ain't right.

The Grand Solution and Solvers??


I'm so scared in case I fall off my chair.

Pioneers of Selamkan Malaysia

And I'm wondering how I'll get down the stairs.


Clowns to the left of me!

Malaysia's Future.


Jokers to the right!


Harapan Bangsa!

Here I am stuck in the middle with you.

Keluhan Bangsa


Yes I'm stuck in the middle with you.

And I'm wondering what it is I should do.

The House - of the Rising Sun. Check this song by The Animals.

It's so hard to keep this smile from my face.

"For men may come and men may go / But I go on forever" - from Alfred Lord Tennyson "The Brook".  AsH, stop being a nitwit!  Tennyson was writing about a clean-flowing river!


Losing control and running all over the place.

The Great and Good Saviours of Malaysia.  Do I see Osman, our road-sweeper somewhere in that line-up? 



Clowns to the left of me!

Playing up the numbers. With the aid of a state of the art abacus perhaps?


Jokers to the right!

For the Malaysian Opposition, "I get by with a little help from my friends" - who are good at additional mathematics.  Ash had to give up the Additional Mathematics Paper when she was in Form Five at Crescent Girls' School - I guess I was not as smart and as canny as the millenials.  Note the FCs and FA attached to each Party, I didn't realise that MPs and their Parties are part of a Football Club/Association.  I understand that footballers  are very highly paid just for chasing and kicking one ball into a net!  But then what do we post-war boomers know! But do check that song "Great Balls of Fire".


Here I am stuck in the middle with you.

Those two earlier images (clowns and jokers) are  examples of our social media thinkers: (a) their self-image (after Rodin's The Thinker); (b) the reality (after a picture on a T-shirt).



When you started off with nothing

Read the small print at the top of the image, that is a typical advice from lawyers .  Look up Shirley Bassey's "I who have nothing".


And you're proud that you're a self-made man.

Beware of self-made men. Also self-serving and self-regarding men AND women.  By the way, Ash is aware of the tenets of PC-ism.


Oooooo-ooo-ooooooh

And your friends they all come crawling.

Aaah!  Where would we be without our heroes and mentors and sifus and gurus?


Slap you on the back and say

What a kind and touching comment.  I used to write quite a number of  such testimonials for my former students.  In fact we teachers had to do this for each and everyone of our school leavers in their School Leaving Certificates.  I must have done hundreds.  

 

Please ...

Please ...


Trying to make some sense of it all.

Who will give them a testimonial?


But I see it makes no sense at all

.

......or maybe a Datin or Tan Sri?  But titles cannot ease their exhaustion or compensate for the lost family-time. 

Is it cool to go to sleep on the floor?

These people (civil servants and other public servants like the police and Armed Forces) just eat and sleep.  Such criticisms have been thrown at them  during the last government - that their numbers should be drastically reduced.  Thank you whoever you are (in that image above) for your dedication and steadfastness.  You make a truly magnificent Bangsa Malaysia. People like you deserve a place in our History textbooks.


I don't think that I can take anymore.

You have the nation's eternal gratitude.  You are the nation's only inspiration and hope.




Clowns to the left of me!

Where are the good capitalists?


Jokers to the right!

You seek them here/You seek them there - where are the good capitalists?  


Here I am stuck in the middle with you.

It's a thankless job.  Come rain or shine,  you diligently carry on with your duties.  You help to maintain a semblance of normality and sanity by keeping our streets clean and healthy. You deserve the title Tokoh Anak Malaysia!



When you started off with nothing.

The mother of all reconciliations or just opportunism???


And you're proud that you're a self-made man.

Or maybe 122+1 cheers for the next Ayam yang berkokok.  I wrote that in 2016!


Ooooo-ooo-oooooh

And your friends they all come crawling.

Slap you on the back and say

Please ...

Please ...


Well I don't know why I came here tonight.

The Dewan Rakyat had been touched by Covid 19!  Mind you, it's a conspiracy by the DG and the incumbent PM.


I've got the feeling that something ain't right.

It's the Government's fault. The Government failed to "improve the standard of ventilation" in our hallowed hall of horror!!  Kerajaan Gagal!!!!!

I'm so scared in case I fall off my chair.

And I'm wondering how I'll get down the stairs.


Clowns to the left of me!

Our Gallery of ___________ . Fill in the blank space yourself .




Jokers to the right!

Kerajaan Gagal!!!  Bring on the Corporate Cavalry and pressurize the Government for more subsidies "or else the economy will collapse".  Where are the caring and patriotic Capitalists?


Here I am stuck in the middle with you.

This is Anak/Bangsa Malaysia Baru 2021.


Yes I'm stuck in the middle with you.

The faces of Anak/Bangsa Malaysia Baru.


Yes I'm stuck in the middle with you ...


A continuation of the image above.

Yes I'm stuck in the middle with you ...

AsH  wrote this in 2018.  She is a belacan Malay.

Yes I'm stuck in the middle with you ...

LAST CALL - Will  the last anak Melayu to leave the room, please switch off the light!



Source of Lyrics: Musixmatch